Wellness | Ready for a New year, New me free resolution? , ready to make some that you can actually stick to ?
New year, New me is out the window ! I have been known to partake in this tradition until I realised how utterly crazy it actually is, the only way to move forward in a year is to be a new version of myself ? No thanks .
Actually the whole process of resolution making is a little crazy, we basically sit down and think "Ok, what's wrong in my life?” We dissect our lives to find the things that we dislike about ourselves , the areas we feel we are “failing” . We then, get this !! Announce our mis-givings to the world , and make a solemn vow to improve ourselves.
Come March we are bored of telling people who ask … “So how's it going?" How we actually didn’t stick it out !! How those things we declared we don't like about ourselves are still very much part of us and we failed at being the new us , we are basically just old us !! . Now I've written that all down, I really wonder why we do it atal ?! Now I'm not an anti- resoluter ( is that a thing ?) I still love to make a resolution each year , BUT I do think there is a kinder way to do it?
So here is my guide to making kinder resolutions? Cos come on we could all do with a little more kindness right!
How do I figure out what resolution I should make ?
Reflection. Before we again repeat the same resolutions of the last 5 years ``Go to the gym `` "Eat healthier” that we never actually really stick to , let's reflect on what we really want.
Ask yourself these questions .
- What would truly enrich my life ?
- How can I show myself more love this year ?
This isn't about what you should be doing , get rid of those should's and really think about what would enhance Your life ? Whether it’s learning a new skill , spending quality time with your partner or taking care of yourself better , these resolutions should be something that really will improve your life on a daily basis.
Once you have thought about what changes you would like to make you need some actionable steps , without adding something you can actually do, you're not going to get very far .
So you want to learn a new skill? Your actions could be to research types of courses i.e. online , in groups , live , pre-recorded , or learn in your own time. Take some short courses to figure out what you really enjoy .
More time quality time with your kids ? You could try scheduling a specific time in the week to do something just with them , Create a monthly games night or weekly family walk .
Want to be more present with your partner? This could be switching off your phone after 9pm , scheduling a regular date night wether thats out or in ?
Now how do you achieve this ?
More quality time with the kids? Try Scheduling in specific time in the week to do something just with them , create a monthly games night or weekly family walk .
Being more present with your partner? Could be switching off your phone after 9pm , scheduling it for date night ?
Now that all important , how do I stick to my New Year's resolutions ?
Changes are hard , if one day or week doesn't go well that's ok !!! Don’t berate yourself , there is no need for punishment or to feel bad , it's just one day. This also isn't a sign for you to give up , ask yourself why it didn't go well this time?, is there something you can change or do differently . Life is imperfect , and as humans so are we, if the evening walk with the family didn't go well, then try a diff time of day , or perhaps do something together that's less physical? , remember your resolutions are meant to enrich your life , not become an added stress !!
It’s all about the journey .
Remember it's about the journey not the outcome . We often pin our happiness and vision on that end goal , when we arrive there everything is going to be sunshine and roses, this often makes it feel like:
1. A big job with no end in sight
2. A disappointment when we arrive and it doesn't feel as great as we thought.
Your resolutions should be about the journey , about each day you make a change and how that change has a positive effect on your mind, body, soul and the community in that moment . It's about the things you learn along the way , about yourself , and the world around you . It's about the memories you make , and how it adds to your life.
Now don't forget.
Wellness isn't a destination , no one product , service or action is the magic key , it's an accumulation of small decisions each day that have a positive effect on your mind, body, lifestyle and the world around you . Changes like these are felt deep inside , the smallest of things can create huge waves in your life and they aren't always an insta worthy “before and after” pic able to show the changes and positive effect you've made , they are something that often only you can see and feel the benefit of , but after all this is all that matters.
Your resolutions are exactly that .. YOURS !!! do what feels good for you !!
Stacey Is the founder of Planthaya , a wellness lover and a true believer that your wellness journey is just that YOURS !!